It is not difficult for me to write on this topic. Crises are a phenomenon that I personally know very well. I experienced a lot of them and my core specialization is in the field of helping people in crisis situations. I can help them precisely because I have my own rich experience in this and can, quite accurately, understand their feelings. In this essay I will describe my personal experience in dealing with crises as an example of experiencing a crisis related to my divorce in three parts.

Would crisis prevention have been possible?

There is no single or easy answer to this question, since history does not allow for subjunctive analysis. But, I think that the problems that became visible during my divorce period existed long before the start of this crisis, but they existed in a veiled form beyond my awareness. If I had started going to a psychotherapist long before the start of this process, then the course of events would have developed in a different scenario. I do not think that there would have been no crisis, but I suppose that my attitude and response to this process would have been different and the intensity of my traumatic experiences would have been much lower. In addition, I am sure that the process would have been materially less costly and much shorter in time. The main factors that prevented both of us from getting out of the crisis, were our different isolated realities and our lack of psychological literacy.

Was crisis intervention available?

Yes, intervention was possible, and without it, I would most likely have had a worse outcome. I went through 300 hours of personal psychotherapy. Consequently, I gained an awareness of the problem and acceptance of the situation as it was in reality, rather than the one that had been expected. In the end, I reached the decision to use the availability of a mediator to resolve the relationship and divorce conflicts.

Was there post-traumatic growth discernible during aftercare?

Yes. Personal growth as a result of overworked suffering was definitely an outcome for me and it was obvious. First, in the discovery of new meanings. I acquired a new profession, which I now practice happily. The level of understanding of myself and the depth of my comprehension of my capabilities has changed a lot. I discovered and worked out the skill of turning to my essential being and beliefs. I gained many psychological skills and a new circle of friends. Now I can be more sure in saying that I create my own destiny and live my own life.

If you had to relive that crisis situation again, what would you do differently?

I think that, equipped with my new psychological tools, skills, and knowledge, I would have handled a similar crisis situation differently. I would have tried my best to keep the dialogue and conversation open and would have tried to sign a peaceful agreement as soon as possible. What allows and enables me to do this now? Awareness and acceptance of the fact that there is still no other outcome, that life is finite and it is a pity to waste my time on meaningless actions dictated by outside affects.